Navigating the Adventure of Raising Young Adults
Dear Fellow Travelers on the Parenting Journey,
As parents, we all remember the boundless energy, the mountains of laundry, and the sticky handprints that defined the earlier years of raising our children. Now, as they embark on the voyage into young adulthood—college life, new friendships, and making decisions that don’t involve us—it’s time for us to navigate the uncharted waters of parenthood. And with two daughters currently in college, I’m right there with you, feeling every twist and turn of this remarkable journey.
Watching Them Soar: Where Did the Time Go?
First things first—how did they grow up so fast? One moment, you’re stepping on LEGO bricks, and the next, you’re stepping back as they stride toward new beginnings. It’s a whirlwind of emotions, from incredible pride to a subtle but persistent nostalgia. And amidst all this, there’s an undeniable excitement in seeing them transform their dreams into reality, even if that reality also includes ramen noodle dinners and an affinity for caffeine.
But with all this change comes a quiet shift in our role as parents. We’ve spent years guiding, teaching, and preparing them, and now we find ourselves in the passenger seat of their journey, watching them take the wheel. And as much as we’d love to shout directions from the backseat, we have to trust that they know how to navigate the road ahead.
Learning to Let Go (Sort of…)
The hardest part? Resisting the urge to jump in with unsolicited advice. Remember when they learned to ride a bike? You ran beside them, hands hovering, ready to catch them if they fell. Now, we must trust in the balance they’ve found, knowing there might be a few tumbles along the way. Our role now is to “hold space”—to be there without being overbearing, to listen more than we instruct, and to offer support without interference.
This isn’t always easy. Some days, we may feel the ache of their absence more deeply than others. We may overanalyze a short text or wish for one more moment of the way things used to be. But part of loving them well is giving them the freedom to step into their own story, even when it means stepping back from the lead role we’ve played for so long.
Adding Humor to the Mix
Let’s face it—parenthood at this stage requires a good sense of humor! Embrace the hilarity of discovering half-eaten pizzas under a dorm bed on move-out day or deciphering texts that seem like they’re typed in a secret language. Humor can diffuse tension and remind us not to take life (or ourselves) too seriously. If we can laugh at the chaos, we can handle just about anything.
Practical Ways to Support Them
If you're anything like me, you want to do something—some tangible way to still be there for them, even from miles away. Here are a few ways we can offer support without hovering:
Open-Door Policy: Stay accessible for those calls where “I just need to talk.” Sometimes, it's not about fixing the issue but just being the ear that listens.
Care Packages to the Rescue: Never underestimate the power of a surprise package filled with their favorite snacks, stress balls, or even a quirky pair of socks. Believe me, they’ll be the envy of their dorm.
Encourage Independence: Celebrate their victories, whether big or small, and remind them you believe in their ability to overcome obstacles. Your confidence in them will fuel their self-esteem.
Plan Visits (Carefully): Agree on times when your visit will be welcome rather than intrusive. This way, they have their space, and you get to see their space.
Stay Updated: Ask about their classes, roommates, and clubs without grilling them for every detail. Show interest that promotes sharing, not screening!
As We Journey Forward…
Having kids in college is a profound transition, not just for them but for us as well. It’s about growing, adapting, and, yes, sometimes worrying about their laundry habits. But ultimately, it’s about creating a new chapter in our relationship built on mutual respect, love, and an appreciation for who they are becoming.
And while we may not be tucking them in at night or packing their lunches anymore, we are still their home. We are still the ones they’ll call when they need advice, encouragement, or just a reminder of who they are.
So, let’s continue cherishing these moments, supporting one another, and, above all, savoring this incredible ride. After all, we’ve raised them to spread their wings—now it’s our time to watch with pride as they take flight.
Love Always, Laura
Connect With Me
I’m so glad you’re here. If my story resonates with you, I’d love to connect. Whether you're interested in speaking engagements, design work, or just want to share your journey, feel free to reach out — let’s start a conversation!
